The Capital of Cheating

A teacher asked her students, “Having more than one wife at a time is known as polygamy, but what is having just one wife all your life called?  And a pupil replied, “monotony”.  Ashley Madison is a major website for married people who want to cheat on their spouse.  Its slogan is, “Life’s short, have an affair.”  Begun in 2001, the title was created from two popular female names, Ashley and Madison.  The online site currently averages 125,000,000  (125 million) visits or hits, each and every month.  And up till now, the pro-adultery service was operating under the media radar.  But on July 15, 2015, hackers breached the Ashley Madison computer security system and gained access to all of their customer data.  The information thieves then threatened to release the names of all of the adulterers, city by city (so far they have only given out first names in each locale).  But this has been enough info to come up with a list, percentage wise, of the cities with the most cheating hearts. And who’s number one?  No, it’s not New York, Paris, Los Angeles, London, Las Vegas, Berlin, Toronto, Tokyo or even Washington D.C.  It’s Ottawa.  More than one-out-of-five adults in the nation’s capital have active Ashley Madison accounts.  And to narrow it down even further, the most popular postal code of all the Ottawa users?  Parliament Hill.

There’s an old saying, “You go to the Conservative convention for the liquor, the Liberal convention for the ladies, and the NDP convention for the pamphlets.”  If that’s the case, then three cheers for the socialists from this tea-totaling and monogamous Baptist preacher.

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