Coming Up…

Sunday, January 21st Adult Bible Class at 10:00 a.m. with Pastor Gary Morning Service at 11:00 a.m. with Pastor Gary Evening Service at 7:00 p.m. with Dr. S.M. Davis (on screen)

LAST YEAR IN JERUSALEM

Abe was visiting Israel for the first time. As soon as his plane landed, he got a taxi to take him to his hotel. The taxi driver was very friendly and told Abe all kinds of useful information.  Then Abe asked the driver, “Say, is Israel a healthy place?”  “Oh, yes, it really is,” the … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

January 14, 2018 Adult Bible Class at 10:00 a.m. – Pastor Fischer Morning Service at 11:00 a.m. – Pastor Eric Watson Evening Service at 7:00 p.m. – Dr. S.M. Davis (on screen)

CATS VS. DOGS

It’s A No-Brainer As the stranger enters a country store, he spots a sign: “Danger! Beware of Dog!”  Inside, he sees a harmless old hound asleep in the middle of the floor.  “Is that the dog we’re supposed to beware of?” he asks the owner. “That’s him”.  “He doesn’t look dangerous to me. Why would … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

Sunday, January 7th, 2018 10:00 a.m. – Adult Bible Class – “What Would Judas Do?” 11:00 a.m. – Morning Service – Communion – Pastor Fischer 7:00 p.m. – Evening Service – Dr. S. M. Davis preaching on screen about God’s Viewpoint on Having Babies

WHO DO YOU SAY THAT I AM?

A speaker once asked a group of children at a summer Bible camp, “Hey kids, what’s grey, runs real fast, has a big bushy tail, climbs trees, and hides nuts for winter?”  The kids were quieter than a roomful of nuts.  The boys and girls just sat and stared.  So the speaker asked again, “Come … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

December 31, 2017 11:00 a.m. Service with Pastor Gary 7:00 p.m. Service – An animated family film (put out by The Torchlighters) will follow the extraordinary adventures of Adoniram Judson and his wife, Ann.  A time of fellowship with pizza and punch will be enjoyed later in the fellowship room.

THIS YEAR IN JERUSALEM

One day an old couple decided to go to Jerusalem for a vacation. A few days after they arrived the elderly wife died. The man who worked at the local funeral home told the husband that he could pay $150 to have her buried here in Israel or pay $4,000 to have her body shipped … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

Family Night Skate – There is one fun winter event scheduled during “R & R” week.  Everyone is invited out to the Belmore Arena to skate or to watch.  The date is Friday, Dec. 22nd.  The time is from 7:00 p.m. to 8:30 p.m.  The cost is free. Sunday, December 24th – no 10:00 Sunday … [Read more…]

FINALLY, A LEG TO STAND ON

The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later, a snake walked up to him carrying the very same Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the snake’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

School Christmas Program – Wednesday, December 13th at 7 p.m.  Stay for a “Tim Horton’s Fellowship” following the program.

JESUS WAS NOT A REFUGEE

A busload of politicians is driving by a farm where a man lives alone. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and crashes into the ditch. The farmer comes out, and finding the politicians, buries them. The next day the police are at the farm questioning the man. “So you buried … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

Young Adults – December 8th – All young adults (single or married) are invited out for a Christmas party at the home of John and EmmyLou Wassink.  The time is 7:00 p.m.  Refreshments will be provided, but each person is asked to bring one wrapped gift of approximately $10 value.

EARTH TWO?

One day a theologian and an astronomer were talking together. The astronomer said that after reading widely in the field of religious things that he had come to the conclusion that all religion could be summed up in a single phrase, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” – and he … [Read more…]

Coming up…

December 3, 2017 – Pastor Gary will be speaking in all services.  We will begin the joyous celebration of the Christmas season with songs, sermons and socials centering on the wonderful news of Jesus’s birth.  The Christmas pot-luck meal is at 6:00 p.m. (Bring a main dish and dessert.)

BEHAVING LIKE ANIMALS

A man wrote a letter to a hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: “I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well-behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me?”  An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

Sunday, November 26th – Adult Bible Class (10 a.m.) Pastor Gary; Morning Service (11 a.m.) Stuart Foy; and Evening Service (7 p.m.) Mark Wassink

Coming Up…

Sunday, November 19th at 10:00 – Adult Bible Class – Pastor Fischer; 11:00 – Morning Service – Pastor Eric Watson; 7:00 p.m. – Evening Service – Dr. Paul Chappell (on screen) Saturday, November 25th – 3:00 to 5:00 p.m., everyone is invited to a “come-and-go” celebration of Helene Borrmann’s 80th birthday at the church.  Best … [Read more…]

THE TOP REASON FOR CHURCH SHOOTINGS

Two men sat beside each other in church: one was a member and the other was a visitor.  The member then began to question the visitor: “Are you a Christian?”  “Yes.” “Protestant or Baptist?”  “Baptist.” “Evangelical or fundamental?”  “Fundamental.” “Fellowship or independent?”  “Independent.” “Local church or invisible church?”  “Local.” “Sprinkling or immersion?”  “Immerse.” “Church membership … [Read more…]

Hymn Sing

Sunday, November 12th, in the morning service will be a hymn-sing.  Have your favourite hymn in mind for us to include.  Pastor Fischer will preach as well. Sunday, November 12th, in the evening service will be an on-screen message by Dr. Davis. The Adult Bible Class at 10:00 a.m. continues in the series on Creation … [Read more…]

Trunk or Treat?

The New Tradition That Is Changing Halloween As We Have Known It It’s a foggy Halloween night.  A man is walking home alone late when behind him he hears – bump, bump, bump.  Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down … [Read more…]

Speakers This Week

Prayer Meeting – Oct. 25th – 7:00 p.m. – Missionary Neil Stirling October 29th – 10:00 Adult Bible Class – Pastor Fischer October 29th – 11:00 – Pastor Fischer October 29th – 7:00 p.m. – Mark Wassink

Hell Houses

A lady shares  – One Halloween a trick-or-treater came to my door dressed as Rocky, with satin shorts, high-top sneakers, boxing gloves, etc.  I gave him some goodies and soon he returned for more. I asked, “Aren’t you the same Rocky who left my doorstep several minutes ago?” He replied, “Yes, but now I’m the … [Read more…]

The Stirlings

Sunday, October 22nd, 7:00 p.m. In the evening service we will have Missionary Miriam Stirling updating us on her work in Benin, Africa. Wednesday, October 25th, 7:00 p.m. Neil & Leta Stirling, former missionaries to Africa will be visiting and Neil preaching in our prayer meeting.

HUGH HEFNER (1929 – 2017)

He Won The Culture War, Lost His Soul, And Left Us With A Mess To Clean Up One lady writes as follows: The lingerie store where my aunt works was crowded with shoppers selecting Valentine’s Day gifts for their wives. A young businessman came to the register with a lacy black negligee. My aunt noticed … [Read more…]

October 15th

Bible Class (10:00) – Pastor begins a new “show and tell” series on the timely topic of Creation Evangelism. Morning Service (11:00) – Pastor will speak on the words of David, Thy Gentleness Hath Made Me Great. Evening Service (7:00) – Dr. S. M. Davis will be shown on the screen preaching on Expectations: the … [Read more…]

THE BIGGEST THING IN BASEBALL

Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both lived into their early 90’s, when one of them suddenly fell deathly ill. His friend came to visit him on his deathbed and they reminisced about their long friendship. The friend said, “Listen, when you die, do me a favour. I want to … [Read more…]

THE AMAZING PLACENTA A Selfless Servant

Someone once asked an expectant lady, “How many days are there in a month?”  She responded, “Each month has 30-31 days except for the last month of pregnancy which has 1,453!” Even with all the labour pains, one of the greatest joys in life is the welcoming of a new baby into the world.  But … [Read more…]

Thanksgiving Time

Seniors: Autumn Meal – Monday, Oct. 2nd at 5:00 at Anna Mae’s Restaurant in Millbank School Students: Pumpkin Ice Cream during afternoon break on Oct. 6th. Church Fellowship: Oct. 8th, please bring an autumn dessert to share and apple cider and apple juice will be provided following the evening service. October Speaking Schedule: Oct. 1 … [Read more…]

POINTING TOWARDS CANADA

Donald Trump Wants To Bring Our Immigration Policy Down To America A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says, “Sorry, you know the law, you’ve got to go back across the border right now.”  The Mexican man pleads with him, … [Read more…]

New Sunday School Class

The new Sunday School class is for junior-aged kids  (9 – 11) and begins next Lord’s Day (September 24) at 10:00 a.m.  Mrs. Susan Foy will be teaching this class.

LOOKING FOR LOOPHOLES

The talented comedian and movie actor, W. C. Fields, led an unrestrained showbiz life, displaying a fondness for alcohol and women.  His best friend, Gene Fowler, wrote of Fields, “No man ever worked so patiently at wrecking his body and soul as did this man.”  At Christmas time in 1946, an aged Fields was in … [Read more…]

Coming Up…

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 17 Adult Class 10:00 – Pastor Gary Morning Service 11:00 – Pastor Gary Evening Service 7:00 – Dr. S.M. Davis (Part 2)

IN A NUTSHELL

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.  Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. “I’m afraid I’m the bearer of bad news,” he said as he surveyed the worried faces.  “The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a … [Read more…]

Coming Up

Sunday, September 10 Adult Bible Class – Pastor Gary Topic:  The Gospel According to the Amish Morning Service – Pastor Gary Evening Service – Dr. Chappell on video

EUROPE’S CHILDLESS LEADERS

A woman came from a large family of six sisters and six brothers. One day she was looking through the family photo album when she noticed that in picture after picture, all the children were dressed in matching outfits. Later, she asked her mother why everyone – even the baby – was dressed identically.  Her … [Read more…]

Coming Up

SUNDAY/SEPTEMBER 3 10:00 – All the Sunday School classes meet together upstairs in the auditorium for a unified session. 11:00 – We will be having our monthly communion time. 12:15 – There is a back-to-school lunch for all of the church/home school students and their families. 7:00 – Dr. S. M. Davis preaching a brand-new … [Read more…]

Opternative

The End Of Eye Charts? A Polish man went to have his eyes tested. The eye test chart read: N Y X C S F R U Z. The optometrist  asked, “Can you read any of those letters?”  The Pole replied, “Read them?  I know him!” Well, if Jewish optometrist Aaron Dalleck has his way, … [Read more…]

News and Events

NEXT SUNDAY/AUGUST 27 10:00 Hour – Dr. Ray Vander Laan 11:00 Hour – Pastor Gary 7:00 Hour – Mark Wassink SPEAKING SCHEDULE September 3 10:00 – Family Film 11:00 – Pastor Gary 7:00 – Dr. Davis September 10 10:00 – Pastor Gary 11:00 – Pastor Gary 7:00 – Dr. Davis September 17 10:00 – Pastor … [Read more…]

WHAT’S THE HARM?

New Study Finds Alternative Medicine Kills Cancer Patients A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley, when he spotted a famous heart surgeon in his shop. The heart surgeon was waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.  The mechanic shouted across the garage, … [Read more…]

See You In Court

The Number One Reason That Churches End Up In Litigation There was a church in Tennessee that practiced foot washing.  But then a great debate arose over which foot you should wash first (the Bible doesn’t say).  The argument became so heated that eventually the century-old congregation split into two churches – the Right Foot … [Read more…]

Coming Up

IN THE SCHOOL School Lunch – All church/home school families are invited for a back-to-school luncheon downstairs in the fellowship room being held on Sunday, September 3, at 12:15 (after the morning service).  Each home is asked to bring a salad and a dessert (if need be one or both can be kept cool in … [Read more…]