A husband and wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.  The wife said, “You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don’t have to wait as long to get our coffee.” The husband said, “No, you are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.”  The wife replied, “No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.”  The husband challenged, “I can’t believe that, show me.”  So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages that it indeed says: “Hebrews.”

Well, you might want to wait a little later in the morning for that first cup of coffee – that is, according to Professor Stephen Miller, head of neuroscience at Maryland University.  Dr. Miller recently released a study of the way caffeine interacts with the hormone cortisol.  Here is the simplified version.  We are at our most alert when our production of cortisol is at its  highest level.  These peak times are morning (8:00-9:00), afternoon (12:00-1:00), and evening (5:30- 6:30).  Thus your coffee will be most effective if you drink it when your cortisol totals are at their lowest:  morning (10:30), and afternoon (3:15).  Dr. Miller states, “One of the key principles of pharmacology is to only use a drug when it is needed.  Otherwise, we  develop a tolerance for it and require it in greater amounts (i.e., addiction).  But don’t worry when it comes to our coffee hour.  I don’t believe there are any grounds for concern here!

● No matter what historians claim, B.C. really stands for – Before Coffee.

● Man does not live by coffee alone.  Have a doughnut.

● All the coffee in Colombia couldn’t make me a morning person.

● Coffee, the other vitamin C.

● I never drink coffee at lunch.  I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.

● Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.

● Chocolate, men, and coffee – some things are just better rich.

● Coffee in styrofoam?  It’s against my religion.

● Decaffeinated coffee is the devil’s blend.

● Decaf?  You can sleep when you’re dead.

● I make serious strong it wakes up the neighbours.

● I don’t have a problem with caffeine.  I have a problem without caffeine.

● I can do all things through prayer and coffee.

● Take time to smell the coffee.

● Give us this day our daily brew.

● Espresso yourself.

● Stay grounded.

● Take life one cup at a time.

● Better latte than never.

● Deja brew.

● Death before decaf!

● I love days when my only problem is tea or coffee?

● Any friend of coffee is a friend of mine.

● I don’t exercise.  It makes my coffee spill.

● Caffeine is the foundation of my food pyramid.

● Bean me up!

● Rise and grind!